Most people usually have one father in their lives. I had the extraordinary chance to have two. Of course, I had my biological father, but I also had my mother’s ex, whom I considered my father too. I had such an amazing relationship with this man that even after my mother and him separated, I continued living with him. We had plans of him adopting me when I got older, but unfortunately, these plans are no longer reality.
When my mother told me I wouldn’t be living with my ex-stepfather anymore and that the adoption was no longer an option, it crushed my heart. This man who had promised to stay in my life forever and who had always presented me as his daughter was saying that he did not want that anymore. He has his reasons, and even though I am not ecstatic about them, I do accept them.
While I have made an enormous amount of realizations going through this, it has not been easy at all. We both decided that we still wanted to be in each other’s lives, but that it couldn’t be as it was before. I have experienced a lot of difficulty with this because I am no longer in control of the situation and it is not something I find easy. I am the kind of person who tries to keep everything under control, but with this situation, it just is not possible to do so. I cannot control whether we will still have the relationship that we had in the future, but for the moment, I can decide to just enjoy his company and keep him in my life.
I realized that even if it was short-timed, life had given me an amazing gift. This person once told me : “I didn’t give you the gift of life, but life did give me the gift of you. We aren’t linked by blood, but by tears, laughter and confidences.” I couldn’t have said it better. I had this wonderful opportunity to have this father-daughter relationship with him, and for that, I will forever be grateful. This man has taught me so much and has helped me forge the person I am today. Although we do not have a father-daughter relationship anymore, I can only feel happy when I think back about everything he has done for me. I do not know what the future holds for us, but what I know is that even if this experience was heart-wrenching, I can only be thankful for all it has brought me.